Shopping desire...

I was totally fed up hearing my sister requesting me for her churidars purchase for the 100th time.I wanted to listen to her since I dont want her to commit the same next time. My mind turned towards her and my head nodded up finally for the
shopping which she requested for...I thought of taking her to some local textiles. She demanded her purchase only at Pothy's. My inner conscious assured me " kanna kandippa oru 1000 rubai edhuthhu vachiko maa .....!". This happend in the evening..

The next day morning "Ennayum kooda koottittu poveengala ? " murmured my wife in a mild tone. I liked the way she asked in a lowered tone with a totall acceptance for my response whether its positive or negative..Thought she loved to do some purchase for my sister and gave a positive reply. She was totally excited and slowly mouthed " Enakku kooda oru pattu selai vaanganungaaa ....?"

I suddenly experienced electrocution. Unrevealing my shock I asked why she require a silk saree. The reply from her was plausble. Answering me she left the room for preparing coffee. I brushed my teeth with a restless thought revolving with the calculation of anticipated expenses. After a long musing, it looked very silly to calculate these expenses which are unavoidable.. Made up my mind to give a prestigious "Yes" for my better half. " Appa... Saaamy pochi oru 3000 ruba...!". Purchasing Silk saree requires extreme heed which I lag and that made me to take my parents too...

Pumped petrol for Rs.500 ( It was 12.16 litres for Rs.500 a month ago.. My fat, it has raised to 47.23 per litre and my WagonR's tank could get only 10.53 litres now, so sad....) for our travell and we reached Pothys at 2 PM. I ordered them to take only 2 hours for the purchase and they accepted. I was happy for their acceptance and got a sort of head weight on my family obeying my order.

Parking car in the busy roads of T Nagar in the peak hours seems to be a tedious process and somehow I accomplished putting 20 minutes of effort. Entered into the show room after catching 5 minutes walk in the hot sun from the parking lot. The centralised air conditioning in the shop brought down my temper and made me cool.. Reached my kins at ground floor and got my temper raised to see them selecting sarees for my mom which is not in the schedule.

Yelled at my wife about the unplanned activity and shes quiet cool to give me a good reason for the purchase.. I have no words to speak and kept mum for their actions. Thought "Ayya, Raasa.... eduthu vai da innoru 1000 ruba.......!" .

The next purchase turned to silk saree in first floor. I felt really happy to notice that the wavelength and frequency of my wife's and sister's match at a high percentage. Yes they both short listed the same saree costs around 6000.00 which raised my blood pressure. Thank God...! my parents played the trick game by pulling out their aversion towards the saree selected by my wife and sister and made them to choose the saree that costs around Rs.3000. That looked pretty decent too ( which saved me the rest Rs.3000 ).

Churidars purchase was next in our agenda.. We went to 2nd floor. After a long contemplation my sister chose a rich look churidar costed around Rs.500. My wife came near and whispered " Enakkum indha madhiri oru churidar kedaikumaaa...?
".. My conscience chuckled at me " Dey machi yaar moonjila da muzhicha innaikki..". Ofcourse I starred at my own face when I woke up in the morning... I replied her in a low voice about my dislike towards the stictching style of the ready made material
and assured her that I would get her churidar cloth assuming the cost would be omparitively low.

Amidst all these commotion I watched my father who kept selecting the materials for my mom, wife and sister without even asking for a single hand kerchief for himself. Hats off to him..

Next my sister jumped to jeans and tops section to select one which is again an unplanned activity. I shouted at her about her caprice of getting jeans. She reciprocated with an audacious voice revealing that getting a jeans was her long lasting desire.. I turned towards my wife and saw her with my red hot eyes... Though my parents were not interested in getting her a jean my wife sighed and came near me to convince me in all possible ways to make me fullfill my sister's eager. I understood and wanted to respect my sisters desire by joining them in selecting jeans and tops. But my pressure went to higher extend when my wife requested for a jeans too. I abruptly said "NO". I know that could have created a strong dissapointment. But this time I dint mean the cost of the material, I really dont want her to wear jean and tops which would make others to take a look at her.

She kept quiet empathizing my feeling and we went to ground floor to choose churidar dress material. Purchased for my wife and sister one each and swipped out my credit card for the final billing. It came around Rs.5500.00. The clock struck 5 PM. I realized that my order ( alloted 2 hours ) was totally ditched. They took 3 hours to finish their purchase. I vehemently screamed at them signing the bill. I got back the credit card and all the materials were delivered to us. Suddenly my wife held up my arms tightly and asked me a million dollar question...
" Ungalukku onnumae vaangaliyaenga ...?"
My parents and sister joined her and insisted to purchase something for me.. I was totally in a memorable bliss when I realise that my kindreds take immense care in getting me something amongst their own desires. I felt the money which I spent tillnow for them worths a thousand time... Yes they deserve it.......

Will scribble more....

Regards
Akils

My OCD

whats OCD ?

Below stated are some definitions for OCD....

i) Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder is a disorder characterized by the presence of obsessions and compulsions.Obsessions are repetitive, unwanted thoughts.


ii) An anxiety disorder in which a person has an unreasonable thought, fear, or worry that he/she tries to manage through a ritualized activity to reduce the anxiety.

iii) Frequently occurring disturbing thoughts or images are called obsessions, and the rituals performed to try to prevent or dispel them are called compulsions.

.... and there are so many definitions available in internet where I can get the complete details of OCD.

But the pathetic scene is that these things were not known to me at the age of 14 when I became a victim of this OCD. I used to touch the objects three times which is near to me or which I hold at that point of time. The object may be anything like, cap, glass, chalk piece, pen, notebook, foot steps ( touched three times by my foot ), shoes, car, cycle, wall ,
bag.. and what not.


Quite a many times I used to get totally disgusted and sickened by this activity of mine.

Why Should I be vulnerable to OCD ?
Would I be susceptible to any major disaster or mishaps due to this OCD ?
What would others think of me if this continues in my life ?
Why cant I be normal as others without this OCD ?

...My conscience raised thousands of question and suffered without answers..

These thoughts were considered crucial initially... later on the habit has become a domestic chore like combing, shaving etc
Now I m least bothered about this OCD.. Nevertheless trying to get rid of it...

Okay whats reason behind this...

This OCD started from my adhulthood when I was put in hostel at my 9th standard.
Due to immense love towards my parents I wanted to see and be with them all the time.
Since I stayed 100 miles away from my home I pray for them all the time all the day.

I pray for them whenever I cross a temple or idol of God at the street ends.
But sometimes if I think of my parents and find no temples around or to my reachable view
I used to touch some object presuming God exists everywhere and in all things.

Gradually this prayer turned to be an abnormal habit which ended up in touching anything which I have at that moment or which is nearby for 3 times with a false conviction that it would save my parents who are away from my vision. Day by day it aggravated , Initially I had a count of things I touch 3 times but later it went countless.. The member count whom I pray for, also has got increased from 2 ( parents ) to 4 ( brother and sister ) and now its 5 ( including my wife ) and now all the things I handle is touched 3 times by me..

Also If I want to get some work done without hurdles.. I use to follow the same way of touching any object 3 times. I had a belief that If I touch the object 3 times then the task would get completed without hassles...

Its totally ludicrous .. I do accept., but then I continue....

Though grown up , settled in a good job, staying with my parents and married too…
the intensity of this habit has never come down..instead increased…
The only solace I have about this OCD is, its not easily noticable by others , but then this troubles my dears and nears...
Hope one day or other I might get rid of this OCD….

Wannu know much about OCD then get into
http://www.ocfoundation.org/ocf1010a.htm or
just google "Whats OCD".....

And quite a many persons suffer OCD and guy named 'Brad' has dedicated his entire blog to his OCD... Check out..
http://ocdbybrad.blogspot.com





Will scribble more...........

Reachable Deities

If you ask to someone who is his/her favourite deity, They might say Vinayagar, Murugar, Kali amman or some Goddess name.
But there are two deities that we have very near to us.
They are the reason for our origination,
They are responsible for our unique appellation,
They taught us our first step to walk,
They enlightened our life eradicating the darkness of illiteracy,
They fed us with all the knowledge to survive in the world,
They provided us with food, shelter and accomodation and what not..

But we use to take them for granted that these divinities will undergo any pain for us.
we never value them much when compared to the respect that we pay to our cute friend of opposite gender.
we even ditch the desires of them or consider it trivial.

I agree with the famous maxim ( I dont remember right now but like to write down the essence of it )
"Easily reachable things loose their values soon though inevitable"...

Now I bring down the count of my sins by introducing my deities M.G. Arunagiri ( appa ) and Koteeswari ( amma )




Note : May be I have used 'we' in lieu of 'I'. If this persists in ur life too leave it.. else read the 'we' as 'I' .

Cheers.
Akils......